


Crossroads

by sihaiya



Series: Maybe [5]
Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Post-Canon, Multi, eruri established relationship, spoilers for who's not read the manga
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-25
Updated: 2015-08-25
Packaged: 2018-04-17 04:35:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,340
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4652463
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sihaiya/pseuds/sihaiya
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The war is over and the Titans are gone. With no more shifting powers and with some confusing feelings in his chest is now time for Eren to make a choice about the future.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Crossroads

**Author's Note:**

> Soooo… I’m still technically on hiatus from writing ‘cause I’m still moving, but two weeks of vacation renewed me and this is the result. I’m so sorry you all had to wait six months for this one but well, you know, life happened… Anyway, enjoy!

Once all is over no one is really surprised by Erwin announcing his retirement. They never speak about it with him, about what they discovered, about the identity of the Ape Titan, about the whole truth, but it seems obvious to all for him to make that choice, to leave to others the duty and the burden of leading the future expeditions and the reconquest of what once was humanity's world. It's not even the fact that without an arm he's not more so efficient on the field, 'cause his sharp mind can compensate it without a problem, it's that after all that happened he seems always more often exhausted, jaded by life itself, and all agree that he deserves to finally take a break and live in peace the rest of his life.

No one is even surprised by Levi announcing, soon after, he's retiring too. His ankle never fully healed, with him using it without giving it the proper rest, and everyone in his squad knew it, having seen him carry on gritting his teeth just for the sake of the never ending missions and troubles to face day by day. It seems logical, once all quiets down, to leave the future explorations to younger and healthier scouts now that the Titans aren't a threat anymore and they're almost all too much excited about the future to realize that even Humanity's Strongest has given up and that in the end his ankle is only an excuse to withdraw from the scene with as little fuss as possible.

There's only one in the former Special Operation Squad who notice it and mourn the loss the Legion - and himself - is going to suffer this way, as well as there's only one who's not at all surprised by Levi and Erwin also announcing they're going to live together from now on, in a little isolated cabin settled out of Wall Maria at almost half a day on horseback from Wiesebor, the first new village arisen about twenty miles south of Shiganshina's ruins.

Many had suspected in the past that their relationship was something more than a strong bond of trust and maybe friendship, but the two of them had always acted nothing more than with a strict professionalism when in public, so the majority of the Legion remained amazed at the sudden news. The way the two of them leave the scene without clamor, however, ensures that most of people forget about it in a matter of weeks, some too much focused on the prospect of exploring a brand new world and others fast interested in other things, like resuming political plots or chatting about some new and more exciting gossip. The fact is that the former Commander and Captain are a living reminder of the previous era and no one wants now to think about how it was, not when, after an initial moment of disbelief and stillness, people had found new hopes and purposes.

Eren still remembers Levi's tipsy words the night they all celebrated the end of the Titans nightmare, a slurred whisper confessing his being lost, his feeling to be made only to destroy and not to rebuild. It had been a passing moment, he's not even sure of having heard it, but still now, months from that time, he doesn't know how to reply to it. He's certain his former Captain is wrong, he still remembers the smiles of the orphans they've helped thanks to him and to Historia and he knows there's a lot he could do in this new world, but at the same time he also knows he's feeling a bit like him, out of place, a relic of the past, not really sure of what he wants to do or where to stand now that all changed.

He's never been good with words, not without the zeal given by the urge of fighting Titans guiding his mouth, and so in the end he decided to do the only thing he's sure he's good at, taking action and trying to help.

After Erwin's retirement Hanji became the 14th Commander and is now busy planning the first expedition out of the Walls of the renewed Scouting Legion; Armin has taken their place and is buried in the project of developing a new weapon to face the few wandering Titans they could maybe encounter and in the one of coding a standard way to map what they'll discover; Mikasa has inherited the title of Captain and with Jean, that has been promoted to Squad Leader, is training the wave of new recruits they recently gained thanks to the prospect of seeing a world devoid of gigantic threats and he, well he simply became the ex titan freak. With no longer the power of shifting he refused the promotion to Squad Leader: not only he wasn't sure to deserve it for only his human talents but above all he just wanted to find some peace and to see the outside world without any other complication.

He knows he's being selfish, but he also knows, deep inside, that he deserves this respite and so he uses the tons of free time he has in the months preceding the expedition to help his former superiors settling down. He's not the only one doing it, the first couple of weeks all the old Squad and even who remained from the veterans helped them to move in, it was a way to honor them for all they've done and also an unspoken way to say farewell before parting ways. It doesn't take long to Eren, however, to find himself alone in the trip from Wiesebor to the cabin, others moving on and attending to more pressing businesses but at the same time it's like all know this is something he feels the need to do and it's like he's been discharged for some time since no one gives him any task about the upcoming expedition and even Mikasa encourages him to take a break from the military life, at least until they're due to leave once and for all.

He doesn't really complain about it and spends most of his days at Levi and Erwin's place, helping with all he can, trying in some way to repay them for all they've done for him. It's not like he doesn't remember about that night, about what he said to Levi(*), it's just that since his kidnapping and the subsequent move at that cabin his life had taken a frantic pace and he hadn't had the time to think about something so secondary like his feelings, and then, when all ended, he almost felt as an intruder between the two of them and their choice to leave the Legion and settle down. In the end exploring the world like he always wanted to do and ignoring some confused feelings in favor of some others that always shined crystal clear inside his heart seemed to him the natural choice, at least, for sure, the easiest one.

His will to make a step back about said feelings, however, didn't shut up his selfishness, and so he found himself more and more often at the cabin, wanting to spend the most of his remaining time with two of the many people he owns his life, with the only two ones he's not sure he's going to see again once he'll leave Wiesebor, that has by now become the site of the new Scouting Legion headquarters.

They spend the autumn fixing things for the winter and he finds himself really enjoying the manual labor and the free of thoughts mind it brings with itself. He follows Erwin's instructions to help him building a smallhenhouse and share with him the fondness for their growing little flower garden in front of the cabin and for the vegetable one they've started near it. When he's not giving a hand to him - and yes, the pun is intended and it's Erwin's - he's helping Levi with the harder works, like fixing the roof before the rains, helping cleaning their small stable or chopping the wood to store it for the upcoming cold season.

The time with them passes easily and just as easily they fall in a consolidated routine that includes several pauses for the tea and often Eren remaining for dinner and spending the night on their sofa, especially when winter takes over and snow makes difficult return to Wiesebor before dark. They spend the days working together, in a comfortable silence or exchanging light banters and jokes, and their evenings most of the times consist in Erwin teaching Eren playing chess with Levi knitting near them, or with Eren babbling about the upcoming expedition and the outside world he hopes to see, telling them about what he and Armin discovered in his grandpa's books when they where children, or maybe, sometimes, with Levi reading for the three of them near the fire, Eren nestled at his feet rubbing absentmindedly the knots out of the other's sore ankle after a day spent shoveling the snow, while Erwin is lazily sketching.

It's a peaceful way to spend his days after the hectic years he lived till now, it's like time stopped to allow him to taste some of the domestic life he missed since he was ten and sometimes Eren finds himself wondering how could it be, one day, to simply stay without leaving again. He mulls about it more than once, tempted by the prospective of leaving all behind and drowning in the lulling quiet of a simple life, and a couple of times he almost says it out loud, but then he withdraws. It's not even the fact of giving up his dreams that stops him, 'cause he's imagining himself staying for a long long while but not really settling down once and for all, but the small little gestures he starts noticing now that his prospective is changed.

Thinking about it, during the months he spent at the cabin Erwin and Levi didn't ever acted like lovers in his presence, always carrying on the old solid companionship so typical of them. He had never gave importance to it, or even a deep thought, but now he realizes they probably did it to avoid making him uncomfortable as well as avoiding to mention his outburst about feelings on that infamous night. What he starts noticing is that when they are thinking he cannot see them they're somehow different from their usual self: it's not something big or mushy like it was with his parents, but small gestures like little tender brushes between them while they're cooking together, or a brief stolen touch while one is passing by the other.

He slowly starts to feel again as an intruder and to make more noises when he approaches the places he thinks they're in to avoid seeing something he's still not sure how he feels about. When the day before his departure comes and he's searching them to say his final goodbyes he catches a glimpse of Levi nuzzling his cheek into Erwin's palm with a so clear shade of affection in his eyes that something inside him starts to ache a bit and he knows he has made the right choice deciding to leave.

He's barely sixteen, he wants to live, to know, to see, since he never really could, and not to fret about something he doesn't really understand, about feelings he's not even sure this far if they are of the romantic type or more like of the parental one. It's probably this the reason why he never lingered on them with some seriousness, taking his time, the fear of discovering that what he thought to be a double huge crush could be instead the expression of an unconscious need of guiding figures.

And so it's with a renewed determination he approaches them, a fond smile founding the way of his lips. It's not so hard to say goodbye, not with the prospect of the future waiting for him, and he cannot help to salute the two of them a last time, his fist hard clenched and harder shoved against his heart. He makes Levi scoff at him when he calls Erwin 'sir', underlining how now, since he's the only one still in the military, it's actually the other way around, and how they should be the ones addressing him like that.

He's not sure what he feels about it, about the fact that the two men that held his life and freedom in their hands are now nothing more than civilians and can't order him around anymore. He never thought about it till this right moment, his mind filled with simpler matters like doing the laundry or retrieving the eggs from the henhouse, and the realization of how their roles are now reversed leaves him for an instant with a sensation of vertigo. It makes him feel free more than when he realized the Titans were gone, more than when he decided to go see the world with the 104th, his impromptu family by all means, and it makes his smile deepen and go wider.

When he finally leaves the cabin he's still smiling and waving at them with an enthusiastic shine in his eyes. It's only when he falls out of sight that Levi's shoulders slump and Erwin sighs, cracking the calm facade they've put up until that moment.

"You think he doesn't remember?"

Levi is the one who breaks the silence, murmuring those few words with his eyes still fixed on the point of the road where Eren disappeared.

"I think he has more than earned the right to live his dreams."

Erwin's words are soft as the few steps he takes back towards the cabin, hinting at leaving just to be stopped by Levi's new question.

"You think we'll ever see him again?"

He mulls about it for a moment before heading back again, offering his only arm to the other.

"Who knows... Maybe."

**Author's Note:**

>  **(*)** If you don't know what Eren is referring to it means you've missed the [4th part](http://archiveofourown.org/works/3445406) of this series. You don't need to read it to understand this one, but it makes it easier and more whole for sure ;)
> 
> The series is not complete but it’s not discontinued, I’ve got it almost entirely planned, I just need time and inspiration to actually write it, so please be patient but also rest assured that sooner or later I’m going to finish it.
> 
> Thanks for reading and remember you can subscribe the series (rather than its single stories) to know when I’ll post another installment ;)


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